What really matters?

 

‘What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us.  What we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.’

-Albert Pine

 

‘I have an irrepressible desire to live till I can be assured that the world is a little better for my having lived in it.’

-Abraham Lincoln

 

‘You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.’

-John Wooden

 

"We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what we can from life."

-William Osler

 

Picture what your relatives will say about you at the first holiday get together after you are gone.  Your kids, grandkids, spouse, extended family.  How will they describe you?  What will they miss about you?  What stories will they share?  How will you be remembered?

 

I know this is a difficult and emotional exercise.  But, please take a few moments and let it sink in.

 

They won’t list off all of the material things that you acquired.  They won’t pull out your bank statement and talk about that.  They will talk about how you impacted their life.  About how you added value to them, believed in them, lent a shoulder when needed, or just plain showed up every time.

 

What do you want them to say?  How do you want them to remember you?  Isn’t this what really matters?

 

What they remember about you is a collection of what you do, and how you interact, every single day.  You have the ability to make positive contributions every single day and in every interaction.  These don’t have to be big to have an impact.  The smile, the hug, the time you spend being genuinely interested.  By being attentive to who they are as a person.  By encouraging them in whatever they are pursuing.

 

This isn’t only about family.  Family is just the most poignant example.  It is about every one you interact with in your life.  Friends, colleagues, even workers you interact with at the store.  Are you adding value to them?  What are you giving to them?

 

Do you contribute to lives of others every day?  A great question to ask every night before you go to sleep is, what have I given today?  This simple question serves as a reminder that we are here to give, not to take.

 

What really matters is our relationships.  Make sure you put them at the forefront.  Leave the legacy that you want to leave.

 

Kyle C. Ryan